As I write this, I am preparing for a trip to my home town. This will post after we return. This will be my first trip back in a year. The first trip since the house sold and the estate closed. I am going back to my home town, but not to my home. The house is there, but someone else lives there. It isn't mine anymore.
I only lived in two homes as a child - an apartment when I was small and a house starting when I entered third grade. It was never a big deal to drive by the old apartment. It didn't need to be home because I had one somewhere else. This will be the first time being there without a home to return to.
This is also likely our last trip there. Unless we use it as a stopping point on our way to somewhere else or go back for some sort of reunion, there's really no need to return. No family there, just a few friends. Lots of memories, both pleasant and otherwise.
I feel like this trip is another in a series of goodbyes related to the loss of my dad. I'm pretty tired of goodbyes.